Also pictured are Diplomat Archimold from the Empire of Legoland and former President and Supreme Chancellor Brik. Neither would comment on the events that have unfolded but members of their respective teams were not pleased with the election. Sources inside Briks team wanted Gary Block to win.
Technic had no prepared words but his handlers did say they will address any international concerns through Diplomat Allen, who will remain with the government.
UPBR Freedom Dock for Re-Fitting
Both figs though are wondering what the voter turnout will be on Tuesday. Some figs we talked with said they were going boating, racing, snapping bricks or dusting old bricks that day and have given up on the idea that democracy in UPBR will work. One fig who refused to give his name only said. "Can we get Brik back yet?"
Bernie Bricklestone Announces New Car Factory
Not surprisingly both Presidential candidates tried to take credit for this new venture. Mrs. Cheeseslop announced "Our massive taxes on the rich are making them create jobs to make more money so they can pay more taxes.....or is it the massive tax breaks we gave? All I know is our policy is the reason things are going to be great." Not to be outdone Donald Technic had this to say. "These cars are yuuuuge, look at them. I bet my cars would be even yuger. And look at Bricklestone's hair, it is just like my hair. Yuge. I bet if I am elected I can create more jobs than Bricklestone. I know I can. Oh...and have you seen his wife? Yuck, who would go near that!"
Confused is also the word our analyst are using as polling data shows a huge dip in interest for the election and turnout is expected to be very low. Some experts believe it could really be only a handful of figs who vote. Previous elections had over 70% voter turnout but some experts think only 30-40% of UPBR figs may vote. Polling data shows Hillary Cheeseslop with a commanding lead, holding 50% over Technic's 38%.
Rural Renewal Act of 2016
Candidates for President, Hillary Cheeseslop and Donald Technic both tried to take credit for the new neighborhood by touting their own personal accomplishments. Many analyst quickly pointed out how both candidates are full of it and their previous actions had nothing to do with this law from President King. It is very likely both candidates are trying to shift scandals as both have been riddled in recent days with them. Hillary Cheeseslop is fighting with LC1 from the Federation of Legopolis. The news outlet has released emails that Cheeseslop has been sending. Our own experts in UPBR News has verified that every email is authentic and factual. Unfortunately the Fig Bureau of Investigation in UPBR stated that the emails did not warrant investigation of possible broken laws since no laws were intended to be broken. Cheeseslop did not comment on the situation but did state "Did you see what Technic did this week at 3am?" That statement is in reference to Donald Technic's continued insulting of any fig that doesn't agree with him or is against him. The 3am refers to his constant use of social media to distract and enrage figs instead of getting policy and facts in the news. The uptick of insults and distractions from Technic have increased since his brutal brick down in the first presidential debate. Media throughout UPBR have said that Technic really looked like he came from Tyco. Technic's only statement to media was "Wait until I talk to you all about things in the past you already know, that will get her!"
In other political news, Gary Block held a press conference and only asked "Please pay attention to me!"
Cheeseslop and Technic to Debate Tonight,Sept 26th,2016
Standing outside Williams City Circus the two candidates announced they would debate at the circus this evening. Both candidates said it was wise of them to discuss and debate the issues facing UPBR. Hillary Cheeseslop also wants to show the figs of UPBR that she is healthy and is not suffering from the Megablok that she seemed to have last week. "I'm a healthy fig! I feel great! I don't know why I am not up 50 points right now!" Donald Technic used his usual rhetoric to try and get under Hillary's plastic. "Crooked Hillary is sick, you can see it, her yellow isn't as yellow as it once was. She will bomb everyone if you elect her, but I might bomb some, it just depends if they pick on my hair.....and Hillary likes Cobra.....I'm yuge, pick me. I hear the Federation has terrible roads, they should hire me to build their roads, only 30billion needed for great roads. My business is yuuuuge."
Oddly absent was third party LUG candidate Gary Block. We asked Block why he wasn't going to be at the debate tonight and this was his reply. "Are you kidding? I've got popcorn and a nice couch to watch this circus unfold.....and I wasn't invited. I guess I am not being taken serious." Polling data does show that the LUG party is not gaining ground and may possibly be the spoiler candidate that takes voters away from either Cheeseslop or Technic. These voters could also be old supporters of Bernie Snot who we saw drop out in a very silent and not posted fashion. The SNOT fans may protest vote or stay home. Our polling data also shows many figs in UPBR becoming tired and fed up with a election that has become less and less about issues and more about yelling and craziness. In previous elections we saw turnout at 110% of the population. This election we may see less than 50% of figs come out and vote.
Hillary Cheeseslop Sick?
Targa PBR Restarts Racing,
Lego Leaders meet to discuss Lego World. Aug 31st
Technics camp was quick to pounce. "Look at crooked Hillary and her crooked emails. She is going to be the one to lead us to war if she is elected." Many political pundits were quick to point out Technics previous position of bombing the Federation if he is elected.
UPBR Military Exercises Aug 19th/2016
As for Gary Block, he was quick to just say. "We plan on combining islands of the UPBR, like previous presidents have done."
Polling numbers taken after these statements showed a slight bump for Gary, gaining a few points and rising to 28% of the expected vote. The remainder is split between the two major candidates at 36% and 36%, respectively. States supporting the candidates are starting to become clear as the mainland island of UPBR with a majority of the population in urban areas supporting Cheeseslop and the more rural, outer islands supporting Technic.
Reporters were also quick to note that the government supplied photo showed two new tank types to a UPBR military that was suppose to be shrinking, not expanding. No government official would comment but sources indicate the photo released was not suppose to be the one released.
100 Days until Election
LUG Party Announces Presidential Run
The party looks to draw figs who are not pleased with the Plate or Brick parties. In the Plate party Donald Technic continues to call for a ban on fleshy figs, a wall around the nation and also keeps piling on blaming other Lego nations for UPBR's issues. In the Brick party Hillary Cheeseslop and Bernie SNOT keep pushing to get their parties nomination to run for president. Cheeseslop is still hounded by rumors of improper instruction use and illegal brick use. Bernie SNOT running a aggressive campaign to keep equal bricks for every fig and downsize UPBR's military and open its borders wide for any fig to come in.
Ted Click Drops Out
This leaves Donald Technic as the presumed nominee for the Plate party and allows the Donald to focus his attention on the Brick party and their front runner, Hillary Cheeseslop. "We pushed unsnapping Ted out of the race. He couldn't even make a proper Duplo MOC let along make UPBR a proper Lego nation. Now we will focus on winning. Look, even the House of Senate is behind me, they vetoed lazy president Kings idea of downsizing the military. Look at that new aircraft carrier. It's YUUUUUGE. I will make more yuge ships and we won't let nations push us around. When I am president, I'll restart our nuclear program and make the other nations pay for it.' Pundits were quick to point out that Donald Technic had nothing to do with the revamping of the UPBR military. A small aircraft carrier and the large ResQ were taken apart and those parts went in to make one large ship which is more efficient and more powerful. The HoS was also quick to point out they didn't increase fig count in the military. In the Brick party nomination process Bernie SNOT still believes he has a shot at the nomination and refuses to back down to Mrs. Cheeseslop. One thing is for certain in this election, it is going to get very interesting.
Ted Click hangs his yellow head as he leaves the race for President of UPBR
The New UPBR Flagg
In a shocking turn of events the MARS corporation and Arbco rolled out their new and improved aircraft carrier for military service. This massive ship is now expected to be the largest naval vessel in the known Lego world. No other nation in contact with UPBR has a ship this size in its fleet. The name change reflects a shift in naval policy as the previous PBR Flagg was a battleship. It will now be renamed after having updates done to its offensive capability. The House of Senate announce they vetoed the executive order by president King and are doubling down on increasing the military. This comes just days after the Federation announces increases. The Flagg is capable of carrying multiple fighter and bomber aircraft, has helicopter landing and rescue capabilities. There is no doubt a ship this big is nothing more than a signal to the other nations to be wary of a reborn country.
Arbco CEO Brik looks to make a large fortune right away and MARS CEO James McCullen also will profit as his company supplied engine materials and computer assistance to Brik's massive Lego brick supply. The Flagg will set sail later this week and move freely between mainland UPBR and its other island states. East PBR docks will be updated later this month to handle the massive aircraft carrier.
It was announced early today that the aircraft carrier PBR Nimitz has been sent to dock and will be broken down and its bricks redistributed. With peace settling in to the UPBR nation President King announced troop reductions to go forward. The HoS has yet to vote on the presidents executive order and some inside sources say they may vote against the president on the grounds that his rule will be ending in a short time. Contractors for UPBR have been lobbying senators hard this week to increase the size of the military. The lobbying has been coming from M.A.R.S corporation and also from the Arbco corp that plans to expand its shipping and supply business. Candidates for president all released short statements when news broke that the Nimitz was to be rebricked.
Hillary Cheeseslop, "Our wars are over and we harbor no ill will towards any nation in the Lego world, we will reduce our military size to show the world we mean peace."
Bernie SNOT, "The military is too large and the lobbying by contractors is illegal and lines the pockets of the rich. We should talk to all our neighbors to solve issues, even Cobra."
Ted Click, "I will double the size of our military, we will crush any enemy that attacks us and we will deal with the terrorists Cobra right away if I am your president."
Donald Technic, "I am going to make a yuuuuuge military, yuuuge I tell you. I will invade everyone. Nobody will mess with us because I will destroy them. Hear me?
None of the candidates would agree to a middle ground solution of keeping the military at its current size, a size capable of fighting two wars on two fronts. A policy put in place by former chancellor Brik who now looks to profit in UPBR instead of rule it.
Wild Week of News in UPBR
MOC Rubio dropped out of the race for president this past week as his campaign could not gain ground in UPBR. He blamed front runner Donald Technic calling him a "silly fig with loose leg syndrom unable to lead". Rubio could only muster around %15 of support among figs in the nation and his stepping down puts Technic's lead in doubt as Ted Click has gained a lot of support the past week.
In other exciting news the sale of Arbco was made official today and for the first time in months Brik was spotted in public back in Williams City. Brik, as many know, was removed as Chancellor of PBR as the country shifted to a open democracy. The new nation has granted him citizen status and is in talks to have Brik's island become a state in UPBR. No official comments or interviews were granted with Brik but a anonymous source says that Brik plans to rebuild his lost fortunes by becoming the leading shipping and supply company in the Lego world.
This news bolstered international markets and gives hope to other Lego nations struggling with high unemployment and recession. Brik's new tower was completed this week and is now the centerpiece of the nations capitol. Now the tallest building in the nation and sporting a huge "A" for Arbco on the side.
War of Words Between Candidates
The only candidate that has keep mostly silent in the last week is Ted Click who has slowly gained ground on Donald Technic. Mr. Technic called him "the liar" and said "Ted has never built any MOC's of worthy like I have. My MOC's have been YUUUUGGGE compared to his." Ted Click fired back and said "Are we sure Donald is a true fig? Look at his face, look at his hair. It is beautiful hair but look at it? Is he really a true fig from a Lego set or is he a "loose fig", lying to us all along about what he really is?
Is Donald Technic a "true fig" or is he a "loose fig"?
Primary Voting Continues, Candidates Speak
All the candidates spoke after this weeks district primary voting to choose a candidate for the newly formed parties. Today Bernie SNOT issued his platform and assured his supporters he wasn't going anywhere regardless the results of this weeks primary voting in districts. "I will make sure every fig gets a education regardless of cost. I will make sure every brick is equally distributed and health care for all. If your legs or arms are loose I'll make sure you get new ones. How will I pay for it? I will tax The Donald and his rich friends. The rich need to pay more to rebuild our nation?
The Donald also issued a speech today. "My platform to stop the loose fig and misfit fig immigration will be to build a big wall. How will I pay for it? I will make the Lego Republic and Legopolis pay for it. It is their loose figs wandering in that is ruining our grand nation. We border the Federation now, those figs can come and go and their nation is poor so they come more than they go. As for tensions with The Empire of Legoland? I am a dealer, I deal, I deal all the time, I can deal with them. My deals will be YUUUUGGGEE!"
Hillary Cheeseslop gained more ground on Bernie SNOT this week and has a commanding lead and support from those that have chosen the Brick party. Sources inside the UPBR government though leaked information that the candidate may have had illegal bricks in her home and was sending unauthorized Lego instructions out to different figs in the government. Mrs. Cheeseslop denied any wrong doing and said the instructions were legit and legal for use by any fig and not classified instructions.
MOC Rubio was at a local football game trying to show the younger figs he is the right choice for president. His youth and newer look excites many figs but his lack of experience and tendency to stumble at the stump has hurt his chances in this election. MOC took shots at the Donald during a quick speech. "Does he have hands that can click a brick? I bet his hands can't even click a brick any longer. I bet they are worn out."
The candidate that is on the rise was Ted Click who gained a lot of support this week by talking about issues instead of insults. It was also released that Mr. Click was a employee at Arbco which some thought would hurt his campaign but has helped. "My time at Arbco was in shipping and handling. I made sure bricks flowed throughout our great nation. Now that Brik will be purchasing the company from the government that seized it we will see a uptick in jobs coming out."
That leaked bit of information had figs scrambling for more news since Brik has not been seen or heard of since the end of the civil war. Sources in the government confirmed the sale was going forward and that Brik is still technically a citizen so his ownership would be legal. Arbco was formally suspected of being a front for the Cobra terrorist group. Investigative reporting by the Federation of Legopolis brought that information to light. The UPBR government seized and has held the company since then. Our attempts to get comment from anyone in any of Briks companies was ignored.
Candidates Announce Bids For PresidentFeb 28th/2016
The two emerging parties in UPBR have produced a total of 5 front running candidates. In the conservative leaning Plate Party we have from left to right, MOC Rubio, the younger candidate. Ted Click, in the middle wearing blue. On the far right we have the instant front runner, Donald Technic. The billionaire business man with loud opinions.
For the Brick Party we have the only female fig running for President, Hillary Cheeseslop. Next to her is the far left leaning candidate Bernie SNOT. Mrs. Cheeseslop has jumped to a big lead in her party with a platform that changes with public opinion polls.
Since the large group of candidates have emerged both parties are holding Primary voting in their respective states to determine a candidate to run on the ballot in November 2016. Already some candidates are threatening to run as independents and try to win that way. We will see fast developments in this election going forward so the UPBR webpage hopes to keep you up to speed using our twitter account or have polling and quick info on a election page we will have up after "Super Tuesday" which is here this week. We asked both leading candidates from each party for a sound bite and only Donald Technic responded ."I'm gonna win because I'm a winner and everyone else is a loser. The other countries will love me, love me. I will kick out every fleshy fig, they need to leave. I will build a wall. A huge wall, and keep them out. Those loose figs that loved Chancellor Brik, they are gone." Reaction in the media was strong with instant condemnation and figs in the street were quick to start protesting but even with that the Donald seems to have support.
In other political news House of Senate voting has ended and the size of the HoS is now 12 members, two for each state in the UPBR. None of the winners or the entire group of HoS members were available for press shots as most are worried about being associated with any of the candidates running for president. One member who would not identify themselves gave this message. "We are really worried that crazy is taking hold of UPBR. We miss Brik already."
New Park Opens In Williams CityJan-2016
Earlier in the week the War Memorial Fountain was unveiled in Williams City. The fountain is a older MOC but has been cleaned and moved to a green plate in the center of the city. Figs can now openly enjoy its grand beauty anytime they are at work.
Figs walking past were asked what they thought of the new green space. The remarks ranged from "It looks great" to "typical government waste". Politics were also at play with the display as some figs were angry the HoS has time to address green space needs but not move forward with promised elections. The result in the delayed elections has been political parties forming in UPBR. The conservative leaning Plate Party was the first. They are demanding elections move forward quickly for new HoS seats opening up. The Plate Party also has wished the HoS would act to yield the immigration of fleshy figs and figs outside of traditional city and town themes, also the party would like to halt the immigration of "loose figs" who do not come with proper Lego identification. In reaction to this party being formed the liberal leaning Brick Party was created. The Brick party counters the Plates in the belief that any fig, regardless of fleshy, yellow head, crazy head, should be allowed into UPBR but they stopped short of endorsing "loose figs". They also would like to see more equal distribution of bricks to themes not represented.
Figs around UPBR were quick to react as old town and new city figs quickly flocked to the Plate party and many sub-theme and off theme figs ran to the Brick Party. Star Wars, and Marvel/DC announced full backing of the Brick Party. Loose figs, or figs of no identifiable Lego number, were less quick to react as many of them are afraid of being outed since they were favorites of former Chancellor Brik who loved to bring loose figs into the former PBR. One fig who wished to remain anonymous had this to say. "Look, I'm a fig like any other, sure I have a dino body and city legs with a odd head but I click to bricks like everyone, I work hard, I pay my bills. I miss Brik, he wouldn't be bothered by such nonsense."
With the parties forming presser is mounting on the UPBR government to get elections moving. We asked for comment from president Kings office and were given this reply. "The two new states of Carpathia and Darklonia are formed. HoS elections will occur soon and that will bring the House of Senate to 12 members representing the six states. We do not consider "Old PBR" as a state, they are nothing more than a rump state."
Millville incorporated in East PBR
As a nation continues to heal and move forward progress was achieved in the state of East PBR this week as Millville was incorporated. The city will be the capital for the state and the main hub for the rail line that is finally complete.The station opened today in the heart of the city right near the industrial section and close to commercial businesses. Figs were quick to line up and board the fast moving train that now can also reach the Federation territory and beyond. Diplomat Allen released a brief statement. "We have achieved a great milestone for UPBR. This line will reunite the two countries that saw relations strained during our civil war. Our next plan will be to find a way to reach the Lego Republic and possibly the Empire of Legoland."
In other news the election announcements have not been posted for president of UPBR. Figs in every region are becoming restless for the freedom promised to them at the end of the war. Government officials assured those figs that with the finalization of new states the House of Senate elections would take place and then the election of president would go forward. Acting president King's office has been flooded with requests for government programs to start up. Every special interest group is getting in on the action as themes are demanding a change to their way of life and building. City figs make up a vast majority of the nations population but minority groups such as Pirates, Castle, Ninjago and Star Wars are demanding more rights. These issues were never a problem during Chancellor Briks reign as he gave no special treatment to any fig. King's office has yet to comment on the growing size and scope of government action in UPBR.
Mauler MBT Pictures Released
Early this morning our reporters were given photos of the newest piece of armor in the UPBR military. The "Mauler" heavy tank will be replacing the "Mammoth" tank that was only in service for one year but due to its size and costs it was quickly disassembled and its bricks re-purposed for other use. The Mauler looks to correct issues the Mammoth ran into. Urban warfare saw the larger tank having problems traversing the city streets. The smaller Mauler tank looks to solve that problem. Much of the same bricks were carried over, track pieces and 2x6 plates but the obvious difference is the use of the growing supply of tan bricks in UPBR.
Diplomat Allen you will recall is a Brik appointee who has remained in his position during the transfer of power. Many figs in UPBR government call him, "the voice of reason" for international relations. He also carries more weight being a town/city theme and yellow head, two things the Empire seems to prefer in a fig.
Normalcy Returns To UPBR
As a nation heals from a month long civil war figs are starting to return to a sense of normalcy and are going about their day to day brick snapping lives. In Williams City the streets are filled with activity and rebuilding. Shelling from all sides did major damage to many structures but repairs are coming along at a very fast pace. Work crews report having trouble finding enough able torso figs ready for a job as unemployment has plummeted to 4% with the government putting out major contracts for private firms.
Among the growing infrastructure it is reported that the rail line going to the Federation of Legopolis is ready to start receiving and sending figs and imports/exports between the two nations. Along with the trade industry the government offices have loosened visa restrictions on the Federation. "We need international trade to strengthen our nation. The Federation is in need of supplies, we can produce them.
Not to be left out the Lego Republic figs are also being asked to explore a rail connection to their nation. This could be a more complicated venture since the area between the two nations is red territory. No details have been released on how this venture could work as government officials call it "in exploratory talks, like, we need to ask them'. The UPBR does have a fresh supply of base plates so it could lay down more territory and reach the Republic border safely. This could allow a proper police presence along the rail route to protect all figs. It would also open up rail from the Republic to the Federation, reducing shipping costs for both nations.
In political news, officials announce that governor elections will be coming along soon and also HoS votes will be gearing up. "We are looking at mid-winter" one official commented. Figs in all states are excited to see actual free elections moving along. The office of the presidency has not opened up allowing figs to file papers as experts are looking at forming a proper system to allow all figs to be represented. Officials, who wished to remain anonymous, said that the government is working out how they can legally stop figs from forming political parties and hijacking a election process.
Not in the news is now former Chancellor Brik. No press releases have been issued from his people or the new government. It is rumored that he has moved all holdings, bricks and MOC's to a private location. Our reporters will continue to keep tabs on this situation.
A New Beginning. A United PBR.nov10th,2015
Negotiations with Cobra Island brought a end to the fighting in United PBR (UPBR) today as diplomats worked behind the scenes to bring a peaceful resolution to the conflict. The negotiations may have sped up this week as Cobra announced a revamp of its military systems with the introduction of the TerrorDrome defense system on Cobra Island and a new H.I.S.S. tank being deployed. In UPBR a request for comment on those items was "no comment".
H.I.S.S battle tank photo, released by Cobra Island
With the end of fighting a new beginning is on the horizon with UPBR. Later this week the HoS will reconvene to discuss the rebuilding process and transition to a free election system. Acting president King has been traveling throughout the country laying the ground work for open elections in each state and negotiating with figs on the outer islands to create two new states, Carpathia and Darklonia.
"States rights will be at the forefront. We saw that in the civil war and respect each individual states right to self govern under the umbrella of United PBR. We will be opening governor elections in each state in the coming months and allowing two HoS reps to be elected from each state. This should show the minifigs of the world that UPBR is a united country that respects the rule of law and democracy. We plan on having presidential elections in the fall of 2016 giving figs of UPBR time to vet each candidate and determine who they support. We expect many figs to put in papers for the presidency, every theme could be represented."
When pressed for details about Chancellor Brik the president was not forth coming. "Brik is stepping down, at this time we are negotiating the end of his rule of our new United PBR and determining how he retains property rights to certain plates and modulars in the UPBR. In a months time he went from billionaire to millionaire spending a large chunk of his fortune on pulling the nation back together with myself and free figs. We are sure a compensation package will be addressed in the negotiations. We are also discussing the decommissioning of nuclear weapons and territorial borders. We also call on the international community to recognize the change of government as we go through our transition period. We are open to discuss oversight of any concerns with all nations involved. Previous military actions against our figs will be a thing of the past, our nation is ready to reset all relations with all nations."
Acting President King refused to discuss the fact that Brik still is in ownership of the southeast island territory and calls it "Old PBR". Our experts believe Brik will try to remain in power of this small island, run his business and other interests from there and continue to be a player in the international world, albeit on a extremely small scale. The experts also mention it is highly likely certain fail safes will be negotiated to stop other nations from attacking a shrinking PBR.